My Mistake

Written by Jahnavi Bhargava


The name Amalie has been taken from the Mirrorworld novels. Kirstie is taken from "Number the stars".

I can't believe myself. My own little brother Albert, whom I love so much, is lying at my feet. I have killed him. I must have. I can not remember anything that might have happened, but I can imagine. Albert must have had invited me for dinner. We might have had a quarrel, which might have caused me to loose my temper. Then, I would have had killed him.

12 hours ago: "Dear husband, wake up and see what I've got.", said my dear wife Amalie. In her hands was a small, white envelope. She opened it and read.

"Dear brother Rodrick, I have just received a box of gold from my boss for completing a very hard task. Therefore, I invite you to have dinner at my place. Yours Albert".

"Well then, I suppose we will have to go".

"Oh dear! I was supposed to go to Kirstie's place with Sasha."

"Alright then. You go to Kirstie's and I'll go to Al's. And for goodness sake, please control your temper".

Back to the present.

I jump violently as I hear a sudden knock on the door. The door opens with a soft creaking sound as Amalie strides into the room. She sees the body and is horrorstruck. As she recovers from the shock, she cries.

"I told you to control your temper. Now look....... what have you done!"

I ignore her and quickly say: "We'll have to leave this place immediately. I'll go and get Sasha. You get everything useful from the house. Meet me near the bus stop in nearly 15 minutes. Avoid talking to anyone. Understood?"


After 6 hours: We are  in a village far away from our town. We are staying in an inn for the night. By now everybody would have started looking for us. Suddenly, I see my brother's face. We are sitting on a table having dinner. I have a sip of tea. I am now starting to feel dizzy. I fall asleep. I think there was some kind of a tranquilizer in my drink. I can hear voices. One of them is my brother. I don't know the other one. It is rough and heavy, the man must be strong. I hear the slash of a knife. Then, I hear footsteps running away. All is black...............

I wake up. I groan "Amalie, come here".

"What happened, honey!"

"I... I... I think I know what happened at dinner. I didn't kill Albert. It was some big, burly man, I believe". I narrate the strange dream.

After listening, she says: "I wonder....... why, dear Rodrick, you have been so ignorant".

"Why what's the matter?"

"Listen.... we have met Al's boss, haven't we?"


"His boss is a burly man and he also has a heavy and rough voice. He could have done it."

"But then, why did he send the box of gold."

"I think that he wanted Albert to die happy."

"But why did he kill his favourite employ?"

"Do you remember that he has a son who is working under him. Al's boss can do anything for his son. His son might have been jealous of Albert for completing that difficult task.... and so, he must have asked his father to kill him."

"So now..... we only have to tell the police what we know......"

"....... and then..... they might not arrest us. Oh... I am so happy. It turns out that we won't have to keep running for the rest of our lives."...

We have confided in the police and they believe us. We will be living in my brother's house, away from all the loneliness of the narrow street. We have very good and kind neighbours who do not mention my brother's assassination. We are going to live happily ever after. All is well.

This story has received 10 comments

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The Curious Bookworm – 13 July 2020

I loved that but I found think you could add more detail. That would make it a really good story

Reihaneh – 30 May 2020

Nice work

Pankaj Bhargava – 4 October 2017

@ Jhanvi... An excellent effort... Keep at it...

Bluejay – 22 August 2017

Sorry, was on vacation! Yeah, cool! I have a few email accounts myself.

Bluejay Smith – 29 July 2017

Thanks for your honest input I noticed them as well, when I reread it once it was published. I wrote it a little while ago, and sometimes I forget to check for mistakes

Bluejay Smith – 27 July 2017

Very well done! You had my instantly captivated! Could you read my story, The Secret of Erlfog Boarding School? Thanks!

Kuldeep – 19 May 2017

A lovely narration of events put together in an interesting way

Divya – 14 May 2017

Wow! Amazing mystery captured ... loved it

seema gupta – 14 May 2017

gud imaginative and properly put together.

Yash Bambiwal – 12 May 2017

Superb work... Jahnavi